I took Squish to see “The Secret Life of Pets” because I apparently I didn’t learn anything from the whole “Finding Dory” fiasco.
Ravenclaw says save your money. Watch a kitten with a laser pointer instead. She’s a harsh critic.
Things I would rather do than re-watch “The Secret Life of Pets”
- Scratch my poison ivy (actually, this one is kind of cheating because scratching poison ivy is awesome. At least for the first week).
- Take a bubble bath with a cat.
- Read Game of Thrones.
- Pick my nose.
- Pick a stranger’s nose.
- Play Roulette blindfolded with five cups of lemonade and a cup of cat pee.
- Watch full coverage of the Republican National Convention without a bathroom break. While drinking cat pee.
- Redecorate my house in Early Hairball.
- Write an entire blog post with Alpha-Bits cereal.
- Watch colonoscopy videos in 4-D.
- Live out…
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